Tuesday, 14 July 2015

A Bit of Magic


#4

I guess I learnt to jump real high. And it's only now I'm starting to put my feet on the ground. I wasn't trying to escape or run away. Although some of the time, if you'd have asked me, maybe I'd have thought I was. But no, not really. I was seeing what was there, where I could go. And there are lots of places to see and visit. Some of them are physical and they exist. Some of them are further away but felt closer to home.
Never be scared of what's out there. It's scarier to pretend it isn't, to be worried of the things you dare not face.

See I've got the wild in me. It makes me restless. I'm not too good at staying still. And when you were scanned, you wouldn't stay still, maybe it's in you too. Your mum, she's not got it in her. And my mum, she didn't either. My dad, your granddad, has scratchings of it.

But my mum and yours they have the calm. And I guess you'll have one or the other, maybe both. And if you have the wild I guess you'll need to find the calm like I did and if you have the calm I guess you'll need the wild like your mum did.

I'm not suggesting for a minute things are quite so simple, though they probably are. I can only give you half of your story maybe not even that as you'll have to make it your own, do things yourself.  And some of your story comes from your mum, and that isn't mine to tell. What we have given you are the beginnings, the chance to make your own story. The rest will be up to you.

I think, for a bit I stopped believing in magic. And maybe you have to. Because you start to wish for things that can't make a proper shape in your head.

And then you realise something else. Once upon a time I wanted a magic book and a magic ring. I suppose, what changes is how you see magic. My grandpa gave me a book that his mother gave him and he carried with him all through the war. One night he gave it to me. How much more magic do you want than that?

And then my other granddad gave me a ring which he didn't wear very often but when he did he made sure it showed in photos. He had another ring which was so old all the letters had faded. It was his wedding ring. I was with him once when he had it re-engraved. The letters have all faded away again now. Maybe it's a magic ring after all. Letters don't seem to be able to stay on it. See. It all depends how you look.

One day you or your sister or brother will have these things from me and maybe you'll see them as magic too.

Tonight me and your mum went to see Mad Max. It's a remake of a film made first in 1979. I was 4. Your mum hadn't been born yet. So maybe things are circular and they just keep on coming round. Maybe that's until you get it right or we get it right or the world gets it right or maybe that's just the way it is. And there's nothing to get right or wrong. Just chances to take and a way to see. And the more chances and the more we see the better.